Social Media Sanity

29 Saturday Jun 2024

Posted by Darielle Brooklyn in Uncategorized

Tags

anxiety, depressoin, disconnect, facebook, hobbies, instagram, live your best life, mental health, nature, passion, social media, tiktok, x

People are social creatures and social media has become all too present and consuming in our daily lives. It is important to remember that social media can never be a replacement for real-life human connection. Spending too much time on social media can make you feel more lonely and isolated and increase mental health problems such as anxiety and depression.

Research has proven that if you take social media too seriously, it can have a negative impact on your well-being. By reevaluating the connection you have with social media, you can improve your overall mental and emotional health.

Pick your poison: Instagram, Facebook, TikTok and others all have the ability to allow us to feel connected, supported and even loved by others. On the flip side, they also have the ability to make us feel envious, excluded and rejected. We need to teach ourselves not to conform to nor completely abandon from them. We need to establish a healthy middle ground.

You can easily remain sane on social media by compartmentalizing your life from the lives of others that you see on the internet.

The reality is that people who post on social media have control over how others see them. Whether it be their accomplishments, vacations or promotions, what they choose to show the world is mostly the good. Rarely do people post the negative aspects of what is happening in their lives and when we are exposed to the ones that constantly post negatively, this can be mentally draining and just as bad for our own mental health.

Sometimes people choose to post for their own self-esteem and popularity. Even photographs have been covered by filters. Did you know that TikTok has a range of filters that one can use while making a video before posting? What you see isn’t always reality. When you compare yourself to this truly unattainable and unrealistic standard, you set yourself up to feel unsatisfied with your own life and your personal self and it can actually cause you to feel depressed.

One important thing to remember is that if and when you are having a bad day, the place to go to feel better is NOT the internet. Call a family member or a close friend, someone you can feel vulnerable with. Allow them to listen to you and offer any support they can. A human connection is so much more gratifying and helpful than a virtual experience online. No matter how much scrolling you do on social media, the problem you are facing will still be there when you stop. It may be an escape for a while but the reality is that it can actually do more harm.

I certainly am not recommending that you completely quit social media by closing your accounts. Doing that can only deepen any feelings of social isolation. There are things you can do to stop comparing yourself and your life to others.

Never read into anything. Your inner peace is so vital for survival. When on social media, always take any posts or comments you read at face value. Remember you cannot see body language nor can you hear the tone or nuance of any written words. Also never read into the number of friends or followers that you have. Don’t compare your numbers to those of others.

Keep things in perspective and take everything you read with a grain of salt. When your friends are happy and successful, be happy for them. However, if you see an album with their photos covered with numerous filters, remember it’s not reality.

If you find yourself a slave to social media, try to trade that time you spend scrolling endlessly with doing something more constructive with your time. You can use that time to learn a new skill, get back into an old hobby, exercise, learn a musical instrument, get out in nature and so much more.

Life your life with fueled passion and live your best life. Instead of lying there scrolling away and living life through someone else, find your passion and live YOUR best life!

How to Stick to a Plan and Reach Your Goal

27 Thursday Jun 2024

Posted by Darielle Brooklyn in Uncategorized

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achievement, dreams, goal, goals, How to, journal, journaling, plan, reality, self belief, social support, techniques, victory, visualizatiion

Each one of us has, at one time or another, felt super motivated about making a complete change in some aspect of our life. Sometimes we swear to start on Monday evening only to lose every ounce of interest by Wednesday afternoon.

The path that we must take to reach our goals may not always be easy or smooth, but as long as we continue down the path in the right direction, a goal is attainable. If you are struggling to reach a goal, here are some tips on how to actually increase your stamina and help you to do what it takes.

Firstly, remember to always make your goal attainable. Having an attainable goal is an important factor in how likely you will be to stick to a plan.

Visualize your goal. At that first moment when you decided to pursue your goal, you visualized it to the point that it almost felt real. An important factor in sticking to and reaching a goal is just that. Incorporate visualization as a daily practice. When you wake up in the morning visualize the process, even the struggle, and see the end result of how it would look once you attain your goal. When you picture yourself doing what it takes and reaching the ever-so-wonderful finish line, it will greatly help your dream become a reality. Visualize daily.

Write in a journal. Writing down your goal greatly increases your chances of sticking to a plan. Answer questions such as “When do I want to achieve this?” “How will I feel when I achieve it?” “How does my goal connect to who I am and my values?” Describe your goal very specifically. By writing in a journal, you can also measure your progress and record it. Write daily.

Always have an If-Then plan. This will allow you to plan for the unexpected and still stick to your plan. It will allow you to create a strategy and stick to what you need to do. You will have fewer excuses to quit and more options to continue.

Tell others about your goal and get them involved. Social support is a wonderful way to stick to your goal. When people in your life become aware of what you are looking to accomplish, why and when you want to accomplish it and how you will go about making it happen, it holds you accountable. When others give you feedback, keep you accountable and become your cheerleader, it’s likely that you will continue down the path to reach your goal. Tell others.

Plan the first step. There is an old Chinese proverb that says “A journey of 1000 miles begins with a single step.” Take that first step. Take that step even if it is something as simple as doing research and reading about what you need to do in order to reach your goal. From the first step, move to the second, the third and so on. Take that first step.

Always believe in yourself. You need to believe in yourself in order to stick to the plan. By believing in yourself, you increase your chances of reaching your goal. Believe in what you can achieve. Remember the saying “If you can believe it, the mind can achieve it.”

Working towards goals can be difficult. It can be frustrating. Regardless, moving forward is crucial. Sometimes what you thought would work doesn’t. It is then that you think of and incorporate something else that will continue you to move forward. If you find that you are struggling, that’s where social support helps. Ask those that know about your goal for some ideas. It may shed a different light and make you see things in a different way. Adjusting a goal is always an option, giving up is not.

Celebrate your victory. When you reach your goal, relish in it. Be proud of yourself and thank anyone who supported you along the way.

Be clear about what you want. Have a plan. Have support. Create goals that work for you to create the life that you want. Use these techniques and your dreams can soon be your reality.

Living a Life of Peace

25 Tuesday Jun 2024

Posted by Darielle Brooklyn in Uncategorized

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exercise, grateful, health, How to, journalling, mediation, nature, peace, Self Care

A life lesson that is so important is learning to live a life of peace. To recenter yourself by releasing such things as feeling worried and overwhelming anxiety can be challenge. Sometimes we feel the weight of the world on our shoulders. We feel the need to be more than we are or accomplish more than we have. We have a tendency to burn the candle from both ends in order to try to relieve the overwhelming feeling of pressure. Well, the truth of the matter is that pressure will always lurk within until we find inner peace.

Inner peace is the state of physical and spiritual calmness, despite external stressors. Finding your inner peace results in less worrying. It creates self-awareness, increased energy, more positive thoughts and compassion for others. Inner peace also allows you to react to other’s negative energy.

Life is all about living moment to moment. You are in control of what you want to do with your life and when you want to achieve goals. By doing what gives you a feeling of inner peace and by being fully present in each moment makes a significant difference in how you live your life. When you choose to live this way, you create a life that will be in alignment with your personal values, truth and integrity.

There are various ways to attain inner peace. Some strategies may work for you but not others. Each one is worth trying.

Spending time in nature is a wonderful way to feel peaceful. It can be as simple as taking a walk or just listening to and appreciating the sounds of birds. When you focus on your walk (walking meditation) or by taking in the sounds of nature, you can prevent your mind from thinking about things that bring you stress rather than peace.

Meditation has numerous benefits for our mental, physical and emotional health. It has been proven to decrease anxiety and ward off depression. Even reading a book on meditation, learning yoga, listening to a podcast on meditation can all help you on a path to peace.

Feeling grateful for what you have in your life rather than complaining about what you don’t have will cause you to experience peace. Those that have a grateful heart and who appreciate their blessings find happiness and peace within. A good way to experience gratefulness is by having a grateful journal. Each evening, before going to sleep by writing down five things you were grateful for that day shifts your mindset over time and retrains your brain to feeling more grateful, thereby creating happiness and peace.

Never let any mistakes in your past define the person you strive to be. Let go of any regrets. Always remember these mistakes made you a better person. You know the saying about looking in the rearview mirror. You’re not going backwards.

Self-care is crucial for inner peace and happiness. Can one truly be happy if they don’t love themselves? Loving yourself requires you to take care of your mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health. By eating healthy, exercising, and taking care of your well-being, you will feel happier.

A big strategy that many overlook is decluttering. When you declutter your surroundings by organizing and getting rid of things that aren’t bringing you true joy, you will feel more at peace. Clutter is an external stressor and it’s something that’s very avoidable.

Attaining inner peace will not happen overnight. It’s a day-by-day process that will take some time. Time is going to pass regardless, why not let it pass with a little more peace each day.

Finding Your Why

24 Monday Jun 2024

Posted by Darielle Brooklyn in Uncategorized

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How to, live your best life, Motivation, values, your purpose

Feeling stuck with no momentum and feeling stationary is something you can change.

If you are caught with not knowing what you want to do and living in limbo, know there is a way out. If you feel as if you are missing something, you can find it. The way to do this is finding your “Why.”

Your “Why” is your purpose. Your “Why” is your underlying motivation. It is why you do what you do and how you live for life day-to-day. It is your calling, your mission, your vision and your purpose. It defines who you really are and it is your core source for your motivation.

External pressures sometimes make us choose things that we really aren’t happy doing. A good example of this is a job that we have that really isn’t our calling. It’s a sacrifice we make, but it’s not our purpose. Having a true sense of purpose is an essential criteria for achieving success. A true sense of purpose gives you fulfillment. Having that strong sense of purpose actually has been proven to give you better health and longevity. Research actually shows that those who have become aware of their “Why” are less likely to experience anxiety and depression. Having your “Why” is linked to happiness.

Every single one of us has a “Why.” If you deep within, your why is hidden in your thoughts. Everyone can discover their “Why” and live the life they truly want to be living.

To find your “Why,” you need to look at your motivations, strengths, passions and your values. Never ask anyone else what it is that they think you should be doing. Only YOU can answer that question and only you can find your “Why.”

Some questions you can ask yourself are: “What activities get me excited?” “What have I enjoyed doing since I was a young child?” “What can’t I stop thinking about?” “What kind of work would really make me feel fulfilled?” “What makes me want to jump out of bed in the morning?”

Your values are crucial in finding your “Why.” Ask yourself: “What qualities do I possess that I find vital” “What matters to me?” Pay close attention to your answers because your answers will reveal who you truly are.

Visualization is powerful. Visualize yourself in both the near future and the far future. What does it look like? In your visions, are you living your dream? Are you living your life’s purpose that lives up to your passion and your values?

I recommend journalling. It’s such a great tool for so many reasons, including self-discovery. When you put your thoughts onto paper, it helps process thoughts and emotions. Things become clearer.

Finding your “Why” can be challenging. You need to reflect and it also requires introspection and honest self-awareness. It may take time. It will take persistence on your part but the effort is worth every ounce. Finding your “Why” will uncover what really matters to you. Knowing your “Why” will certainly cause you to live a more meaningful, fulfilling life because your interests, values and passions will all be in alignment.

Self-discovery and finding your “Why” is powerful. You will live the life you dream of and absolutely love. Don’t just exist. Life your “Why!”

My Passion for Singing

21 Friday Jun 2024

Posted by Darielle Brooklyn in Uncategorized

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1970's, courage, cover band, date night, dreams, fears, goals, Inspiration, karaoke, live music, Love, morris county, music, new jersey, passion, rock music, singing, wine

Everyone has that outlet in their life, something they do to replenish the energy of their soul. For some it can be gardening, biking, painting, etc…. for me, it’s singing.

At every single point in my chaotic and sometimes crazy path, music has always found its way into my world. I have listened to music from a very young age. I had a vast collection of 45’s and a decent collection of LP’s. I also always walked around with a radio. Two of my favorite artists to listen to when I was younger were Olivia Newton John and The Partridge Family but I loved pretty much everything on the radio back then. 70’s music was fabulous! Music was always there for me and has always been a factor in my life.

A passion for singing usually takes root in early childhood. For me that spark was ignited on the evening of November 4, 2022 at 9:43 p.m.

Weeks prior to that evening, my husband and I were in our kitchen having wine and playing cards, with the music blasting. I was singing along quietly to the music and my husband looked me in the eyes and said “One of these days, I’m going to get you a microphone.” I replied with something like “Yeah right! You’ll never hear me sing!”

Fast forward a couple of weeks ahead. It was a Friday night and my husband, my friend and I were having some wine at my home, again with the music blasting. A few drinks later, my husband brings out a karaoke machine and he was the first one to use it. He sang “Runaways” by The Killers. Now my husband is a drummer, not a singer and it wasn’t his best but he had a blast. We all did. I thought to myself “Wow, if he can do that sounding like he does, I can too!” Remember, I was a few drinks in. I got up and sang “Top of the World” by The Carpenters.

The rest of the evening we sang, laughed and had a great time and when I woke up the next morning, I watched the videos and the reel I posted on Facebook. I received so many nice comments on the reel that I immediately knew that I wanted to do it again the following weekend. So we did. Weekend after weekend we’d have wine, blast music and sing karaoke. I was absolutely loving it and decided to take this newfound passion to the next level.

On December 27, 2022, I had my first singing lesson. I was very nervous going and my son Joshua came with me for moral support. It was time. It was 4:00 and my vocal coach, Mike, came out to get me. It was all or nothing at this point. I could flee or I could face my fear and conquer it.

I followed him into this little room with a piano. I remember quite vividly asking him if the walls were soundproof and he told me they weren’t. My thoughts were racing. “How am I going to do this?” “I should just forget it.” “Should I run out of this room?” After talking for a few minutes and making me feel a little more relaxed, Mike played a single note on the piano and said “Ok, sing that.” Excuse me? What? Sing that? I looked at him like he had a unicorn horn sticking out of his forehead. You mean there’s no loud music to sing to? (And there is no wine involved?) How on earth will I do this?

With every ounce of passion deep within me and with every drop of courage I could find, I took a deep breath, closed my eyes and sang that single, ever-so-important note. I did it! Next we worked on scales to find my range, which I must say was quite impressive. I thought to myself “This isn’t bad at all” and I left there feeling so damn proud of myself and I couldn’t wait for the following week’s lesson to do it again!

Well I’m an all-or-nothing kind of person. I bought all kinds of music equipment: speakers, a microphone, a mixer. I purchased an app to practice vocals with, where you remove the vocals from tracks. I recorded myself daily and practiced every single day. I purchased and surrounded myself with music decor. I even had things custom made. I made a beautiful music room for myself.

In May of 2023, I decided I wanted to start a cover band to play live music out in bars, clubs, festivals… wherever I could. After auditioning many musicians and dealing with so many disappointments, the vision and dream has become an amazing reality.

I am now a lead singer and my band’s name is Daze of Dari. I have the absolute greatest bandmates. We have become family and great friends. We rehearse at a rehearsal studio every week. Our setlist is full, unique and fun and we have played out a few times and have more gigs scheduled. We play mostly in Morris County, New Jersey but we don’t limit ourselves to any single area.

If you want to take anything away from this, it is this. Never, ever, ever give up on your dreams. I am living proof that perseverance and passion will take you wherever it is that you want to go!

I’m Back!

21 Friday Jun 2024

Posted by Darielle Brooklyn in Uncategorized

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After a hiatus of about seven years, I’ve decided to start writing again. I have been writing on my band’s website and it created a spark in me that caused me want to start blogging again. I am making this a short post so I can get the word out quickly. You can either subscribe with your Email or bookmark the page so that you are able to come back and keep up with what’s going on in my Blonde head.

I will be back with a longer post tomorrow. See you then!

Goodnight.

The Day Suicide Became Too Personal

20 Friday Jan 2017

Posted by Darielle Brooklyn in bereavement, Family, Grief, Loss, suicide, Uncategorized

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Tags

bereavement, Grief, Loss, sibling loss, suicide

I vividly remember the day my life came to a screeching halt. It runs through my head and rips apart my heart all too often. I remember every moment. The phone call from my Mom. The screaming. My racing heart. My body going numb and me pulling my hair to feel something other than fear and numbness. Speaking to the detective. Asking questions. Trying to listen to the answers. The what ifs. The whys. The searching. The realization that no matter what I do, I am unable to bring my brother back.

You are never prepared for the aftermath of losing a loved one. Especially when it’s a loss to suicide. No one warns you about the chaos that is about to occur in your life. No one warns you about how relationships with surviving family members change. No one can. Unless one lives it, NO ONE can warn you. They are unable to comprehend it or empathize with you.

I was having a GREAT day. It was a gorgeous spring day. The sun was shining. The windows were open. My music was blasting and I was blow drying my hair, getting ready to go shopping at a boutique I loved. It was the Tuesday after Mother’s Day. My husband and children had given me a gift certificate to the boutique and I was going to go use it. I was going to happily go on my way for a drive with my sunroof open and my music blasting on this seemingly beautiful day.

Then the phone rang. My Mom was screaming on the other end. Nothing made sense. When she uttered those horrific words, I actually responded with “no he didn’t.” I basically hung up and moments later called her back after I realized what I had just heard. I called my husband and a friend. What I said to them is a blurred memory. Everything was now blurry. My brain and my heart were trying to process this devastation. I couldn’t see from crying. My head and heart were pounding. I lost all strength. The remainder of the day was filled with phone calls you never want to make and plans you never want to deal with.

It was just shy of 7 years of the loss of my Dad. A loss that still pierced me to my core. This was something that left me completely shattered. I was desperate for answers. I needed to know why. I clung to every single thing my cousins had gotten out of his apartment and shipped to me days later. I searched. I investigated. I called everyone in his cell phone address book. I was looking for any answers. I was desperate to find pieces of him. I needed to piece him back together. I needed a rewind button. I replayed the last month of his life. It was that month that we started speaking after not speaking for eleven months. I was living an absolute nightmare.

Somehow I survived. As catastrophic as the loss is, I wake up each day with a positive attitude and live my best life. I survive the aftershocks, which still hit me. I realize that they come fast and hit hard but they do pass and I will smile again.

Many experience years they don’t remember. I am thankful that I have my children to keep me going on a daily basis. Without them to keep me focused, I’m not sure I’d have been able to be strong. They were young and they needed me. I needed to be strong for them. I still have my moments and I always will throughout my lifetime. I’ve learned to allow those moments to happen and then I reclaim my breath. I’ve accepted the fact that my heart has scars that will never heal but I’ve also realized my heart experiences a great deal of love and happiness with each new day. It is there that I shift my focus.

If you have experienced the loss of a loved one to suicide, please know that you will find your way in your own time. Be gentle with yourself and live each day the best you can as you continue to heal. It is hard to accept that a piece of you will never come back. But remember that life keeps moving forward. Because life continues to move forward, it is natural that we as humans do as well.

We are stronger than we realize and as long as we are grateful for the good, we will survive.

And please always remember this:

Five Annoying Words

27 Thursday Oct 2016

Posted by Darielle Brooklyn in Family, Friendship, Grief, How to, Inspiration, Uncategorized

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Family, How to, Inspiration, life lessons, relationships

How many times have you heard these words:

Everything happens for a reason.

I believe in fate but seriously? That sentence can destroy us. It is also completely untrue. Some things, absolutely. But everything? Absolutely not!

If you have ever faced a tragedy and someone tells you that your tragedy was meant to happen or that it happened for a reason, even that it will make you a better person, you have every right to be upset and even go so far as to remove that person from your life.

Grief is brutally painful. There are so many facets to grief. Grief does not only occur when someone dies. It can occur when relationships fall apart, when opportunities are shattered, or when dreams die. It can even occur when you are struck with a serious illness.

Remember these words instead:

Some things in life cannot be fixed. Some things in life can only be carried.

These words are poignant and they aim right at the pathetic platitudes our culture has come to embody on an increasingly hopeless level. Losing a loved one cannot be fixed. Being diagnosed with a debilitating illness cannot be fixed. Facing the betrayal of your closest confidante cannot be fixed. These things certainly did not happen for a reason. They damn well cannot be fixed! These things can only be carried.

Sometimes devastation can lead to growth, but the truth is, it often doesn’t. The reality is that devastation more often destroys lives. And the true calamity is that this happens because we choose to replace grieving with advice.

After living through traumatic devastation, I choose to and now live an extraordinary life. I’ve been greatly blessed by those in my life, the opportunities I’ve had and the life I’ve built for myself and for my family. Loss has not made me a better person. Sadly, in some ways, it has hardened me.

I have always been a very loving and caring person. My losses have made me even more aware and empathetic of the pain of others. On the other hand, I also have a more cynical view of some and have developed impatience with those who are unfamiliar with what loss does to people. It’s true that you don’t get it until you live it but there are some that don’t even try to understand it. It can be quite frustrating.

I’ve had people tell me to “get over it,” or that those who passed away “would want you to be happy.”

I am happy. I have sad moments. People don’t “get it.”

If anyone tells you that all is not lost, that your situation happened for a reason, or even that you’ll become better as a result of your pain, you may want to choose to let them go.

I’m not saying you should. That is entirely to decide. It isn’t an easy decision to make and should be made carefully. The fact is that you can.

The ones who helped were those who were there when I needed them. And said nothing. They were just there. But in those moments, they did everything.

I am alive and I survived because of my deep love for my family. I survived and because of those who chose to love me and help me. When you are loved in silence, when people suffer with you, when they watch you in your darkest moments and see you emotionally destroyed and they love you through it, you survive.

When a person is devastated by grief, the last thing they need is advice. Their world has been shattered. At this time, we can acknowledge their pain and let them know that we are there with them. It is important to be with your loved one, suffer with them, listen to them, but please do not give them advice.

Acknowledging someone is powerful. It requires no education, training or skills. All you need to do is to simply be present as long as is necessary, comforting the wounded soul of your loved one.

Be there. Do not leave when you feel uncomfortable or when you feel like you’re not doing anything to help. Because it is then – in the shadows of horror – where healing is truly found. When others are willing to enter that sacred space with us, it is very powerful and very healing.

Be one of these people. Unfortunately, one day you will find yourself in need of one of these people. Find them. They will help you heal and not try to fix you with advice. They will help you carry your pain. These people are keepers.

Fate. Be that person and when you need them, they will be that person for you. That can happen for a reason.

How to Revamp & Declutter Your Wardrobe

07 Thursday Apr 2016

Posted by Darielle Brooklyn in Fashion, How to, How to Declutter, Organizing, Uncategorized

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closet, declutter, Fashion, organization, organize, revamp, style, wardrobe

Whether you are a complete fashion newbie or a seasoned closet curator, if your wardrobe needs a makeover, you’ve definitely come to the right place! How many times have you looked in your closet and seriously despised everything you see? Yet your closet is probably filled and you still think you have nothing to wear. Getting dressed should be fun, stress-free and easy! I am going to list some essential tips that will help you revamp your closet to build a wardrobe that truly works for you. The morning blues in your closet are going to be a thing of the past.

DECLUTTER

One of the most important steps in your closet revamp is to do a major edit of your wardrobe. Much of your wardrobe stress stems from a problem that is quite simple to address: too much variation and not enough unity. Your closet should be full of clothes that are easy to work with and make you feel amazing. You may need to cut down your wardrobe to a manageable size and get rid of items that make you feel anything less than spectacular.

As you go through each item in your wardrobe, try them on and ask yourself these key questions:

Have I worn it in the last year?
Does it make me feel good? This is huge. Whether it’s the cut, color or style, if blah is the first thing that comes to mind when you put it on, it’s definitely time to get rid of it. Life is too short to feel anything short of amazing!
Does it fit?
Is it in good condition? Can it easily be fixed? Am I actually going to take it to get fixed?
Does it go with at least three other things in my wardrobe?
Is it annoying to wear? If wearing that skirt or top isn’t easy, you’re going to be much less likely to wear it.

Quite honestly, if you answer no to any of the above, it’s time to say goodbye. Donate anything that doesn’t stand up to your new closet’s standards or try selling it online on an auction site or in a consignment shop. You can use the cash you receive to buy new pieces!

GET ORGANIZED

Once you’ve gone through and removed the less desirable pieces from your closet, it’s time to organize what remains. Arrange your closet by color and by item type. This system will not only help you put together an outfit much faster, but it will also allow you to identify gaps in your wardrobe. A good rule is to hang up as much as you can. You are much more likely to grab something that you can see at eye level rather than having to search through dresser drawers.

Take a good look at what you have. You don’t want to end up spending money on things you already own, especially if they’re in good shape. Also, if you find that you have an overwhelming number of one type of item (no one really needs 10 identical white t-shirts), purge! Organizing will allow you to not only see what key pieces you have but it will also allow you to identify what’s missing.

IDENTIFY YOUR LIFESTYLE

A full closet means absolutely nothing if you can’t make the pieces work for you. A major wardrobe malfunction is when your clothes don’t match your lifestyle. Simply put, you need pieces that not only work well together, but also fit in with your day-to-day activities. Some key questions to ask yourself are:

How do you spend your time during the week?
Which activities occupy the majority of your time?
How do my clothes fit in with each activity?

Taking the answers to these questions into consideration will help point out which areas of your closet need some tweaking.

IDENTIFY YOUR ESSENTIALS

By the time you reach this step, you should not only know your closet inside out by seeing what you have and knowing what’s missing, but should also be able to identify what you absolutely love wearing and what pieces look fabulous on you. I’m sure those things make up the majority of the clothes left over from the detox phase of your closet revamp. These are the pieces that you can’t live without, your personal essentials. These essentials are basically the only things you really need to feel great. Maybe they’re t-shirts, boyfriend jeans and sneakers or maybe they are Bohemian dresses and wedges. Whatever they are, they’ll become the cornerstones of your new wardrobe. So take a good look overall and at this point figure out what pieces might need updating and what you need more of.

ENVISION YOUR IDEAL WARDROBE

bag-chic-girl-hat-Favim.com-2675044.jpg

Now you need to put together a purchasing plan of action. If you want to make sure you actually wear what you buy, you need to envision what your ideal wardrobe looks like and use this vision as a point of reference whenever you go shopping.

Your ideal wardrobe should be based around a look that is distinctly you and represents your sense of style. Once you know what that is, pinpoint the important elements of that look, and see how they line up with what you already own. Moving forward, every time you shop use this vision and strategy to allow you to build onto your style, ultimately streamlining your closet and making it super functional.

A functional wardrobe should be a mix of basics, mid-range and super statement pieces. You will find that a lot of different pieces will fit into your ultimate vision.

CHOOSE PIECES THAT ARE VERSATILE AND OFFER SUPER IMPACT

Use the information you obtained when you evaluated your lifestyle and ideal wardrobe in order to determine which pieces would have the biggest and boldest impact on your look. For now, unless you are seriously lacking on them, skip purchasing the basics. Focus on choosing versatile and interesting statement pieces that you can wear a lot of different ways. Start by working on the area of your wardrobe that you’re the least happy with. Do you realize that with just a few simple tweaks you’ll see the impact immediately? As you’re out shopping, envision at least three outfits you can make with each item you want to purchase before you actually buy it. If you can’t, it probably isn’t a good fit.

QUALITY VERSUS QUANTITY

Now it’s time to think about your purchases. Can you go out and buy 10 tops for $50? Of course you can but seriously, how long are they going to last? I always say you get what you pay for. It makes sense to spend a little more on high-quality pieces that will stand the test of time. You’ll end up saving yourself money in the long run as well as alleviating the morning fashion stress if you take this approach.

Tip: If you’re the type or person that tends to go a little overboard when you see a sale, skip them unless you have a specific piece that you need to buy. Another helpful trick is to ask yourself whether you would buy the particular item at full price if it wasn’t on sale. If you can’t imagine yourself buying it at full price, do both yourself and your closet a favor and put it back on the rack. Impulse buys can add up quickly. Trust me – it is better to spend that money on quality items that fit in with your ideal envisioned wardrobe.

ACCESSORIES ARE KEY

The right accessories can bring a simple outfit to life and are key to switching up your look. Statement pieces are fabulous, but just like the rest of your closet, be sure to look for pieces that not only offer the most bang for your buck but also those that will work with most things in your closet. Definitely invest in a few pairs of great shoes and bags. You certainly can go the less expensive route for those trendy pieces that may not have staying power.

FIND A SIGNATURE STATEMENT PIECE

Whether it’s an antique piece of jewelry or an amazing arsenal of super sunglasses, adding a signature piece into your wardrobe will give it major personality. Like the rest of your things, your signature piece deserves some thought. Take your time to find something that fits in with the rest. You don’t need much to make a huge impact, so invest in a few key items that will stand the test of time.

Revamping your closet and your wardrobe can be really fun if you are open to experimenting with your style and trying new things.

Have fun!

Why to Lose the Negativity and Remain Positive

24 Thursday Mar 2016

Posted by Darielle Brooklyn in Inspiration, Motivation, Positivity, Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Happiness, How to, positive, Positivity

It’s true. The happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts.

Every single day, events occur which give us the choice of how we choose to respond. Did you know that a single event can invoke vastly different responses from different people? Whenever anything happens, we are always given a choice of either responding positively or negatively. It’s a sad fact that a significant number of people choose negativity even over the most trivial things. Being negative every so often is acceptable but there is no reason to be a chronic negative person. Did you know that negativity has a widespread effect on your quality of life as well as an effect on those who are around you?

Negativity, just like positivity, is contagious. We all have neurons called mirror neurons. Mirror neurons allow us to sympathize with others after observing their facial expressions and/or actions, allowing us to synchronize with each others’ emotions. We are capable of sympathy because our mirror neurons are able to duplicate the pattern of activity of another person’s brain.

Did you ever notice how you feel happy when you are around happy people? The same holds true when we are in the presence of a sad person. A sad person’s mood will dampen our spirits. In a way, you owe it to others to stay positive. Wouldn’t it be better for others to feel happy in your company rather than you being responsible for bringing their spirits down?

Negativity is like a disease, a nasty and contagious disease. Please keep it to yourself. In reality, no one want to contract your negativity.

Negativity is draining. Most humans are sympathetic. Negativity triggers off a person’s sympathy. Most of the time, people cannot ignore a negative mindset because sympathy is actually a form of instinct. It’s something that is wired into our brain. Negativity is like a human black hole. It comes out of nowhere and just sucks the life out of you. No matter how hard you try to stay positive and remain strong, a person’s negativity ends up draining you. You then feel exhausted and you may actually start to feel depressed too. It becomes a vicious struggle.

Negativity can make you ill. When you are negative, your body knows it. The master gland in your brain known as the hypothalamus begins secreting cortisol, causing blood glucose to rise. Prolonged periods of negativity will cause blood glucose levels to remain elevated for long periods of time. This can eventually lead to glucose intolerance and diabetes.

Negative people are stressed people. Stress causes your body to release ghrelin, which is a hunger hormone. This hormone increases your appetite and plays a major role in your body weight. Not only will you seek out a lot more food but more often than not, you will seek out foods that are very high in sugar. I don’t need to tell you that foods high in sugar are very unhealthy. They cause inflammation in your arteries which can then cause clogged arteries. One is then at a high risk for high blood pressure, a stroke and heart disease. Is this worth a negative attitude?

The fact is that negativity is a bad habit. It is something that affects you and those around you. Negativity spreads because we all have mirror neurons and we have no control over it. In the process, we become emotionally drained. Negativity also affects your physical health.

Remember this: For every negative, there IS a positive. Find and focus on the positive. You owe it to yourself and those around you to remain positive.

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