Tag Archives: goals

Live Your Dream Life

07 Sunday Jul 2024

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In order to live your dream life, it will take effort on your part. Your dream life is unique to you. Some people dream of having a career they enjoy whether they make a lot of money. Some people dream of having a busy social life. Some people dream of having a loving family. Others dream of living in solitude. Your dream life should be a life that you find satisfying, full of purpose and full of meaning.

If you aren’t living your dream life, there are several factors as to why. Many things prevent you from living your best life. There could be certain obstacles in your way or it could be the fact that you aren’t taking the necessary action needed. You could be procrastinating. I wrote another blog about finding your why. Your why should compel you to give you the inspiration necessary to go after the life you want.

When you live your dream life, opportunities will always continually present themselves to you. There will always be obstacles but when your mindset is set on your why, you handle obstacles differently. Your mindset will change any circumstance that you find yourself in.

“The resources we need to turn our dreams into reality are within us, merely waiting for the day when we decide to wake up and claim our birthright.” – Tony Robbins

Sometimes we find that we have a skill or an ability that we never knew existed within us but when you find it, you find yourself moving forward on this new journey.

Are you living your dream life? Are you happy with your life and your circumstances? If the answer to these questions is no, you need to find out what is stopping you. Certain behaviors hold us back from living our dream life. Are you doing any of the following?

Evading Your Purpose. In order to live the life of your dreams, you need to stop evading your purpose. Be authentic. Always. When you are authentic, you will lead a life of purpose. This is YOUR life, no one else’s. What others think isn’t as important as what you think about your current situation. You need to make an effort to discover what it is you truly desire in order to go from here to there.

Release Fear. It is certainly natural to feel fear when pursuing something new. The fear of failure makes it feel risky to go after our ambitions. On the flip side, there’s a big chance of success and that is what your focus should be. You know that saying you can’t succeed if you don’t try? The same goes for living the life of our dreams. Don’t focus on limitations. Focus on your inner courage and take the necessary action in going after the life you want.

You Don’t Need Approval. You aren’t a child anymore and you no longer need approval for every single thing you want to do. You are an adult and you no longer need to be dependent on anyone else to give you any permission to life the life of your dreams.

You Don’t Need Validation. You don’t need to hear that you can life your best life from anyone other than yourself. Give yourself validation and permission to live the life you dream of.

Stop Second Guessing Yourself. Self-doubt is highly poisonous. If you want to accomplish anything in this life, you must praise yourself and lift yourself up. Stop doubting yourself.

Put in the Effort. When you put in effort, you can do anything. Boundaries are imposed by ourselves. Visions have no boundaries. Remember the saying “Believe and you can achieve.” Never allow mediocrity. Always strive for the excellence. Don’t minimize your ability. As soon as you decide that you don’t want to live a mediocre life, you will experience transformation.

Stop Negative Self Talk. Always remember whatever you tell yourself when spoken negatively will only cause any doubt to escalate. When you speak positively to yourself, you will build self-confidence and be on your journey to living the life of your dreams.

Stop Associating with Negative People. Toxic, negative people can trigger you and cause their toxicity to spill into your life. Limit interaction with toxic and negative people. Sometimes we can’t completely remove them from our lives but we can limit the amount of time that we associate with them. Personal boundaries are necessary in order to pursue living the life of your dreams.

Stop Comparing and Competing. The only person you should compare yourself to and compete against is you. Focus on how you can improve things to move toward living the life of your dreams. It doesn’t matter if someone has more money than you. What matters is what you do to go about making more money for yourself. It doesn’t matter if someone is in better shape than you. What matters is what are you willing to do to improve your appearance and health. It is never impossible to improve yourself.

Live in the Present. There is no need to look back with regrets. Your attention should be on the present and your focus should be on the future. In order to live the life of your dreams, you need to let go of the past. Remember any past choices and mistakes made you who you are today. Learn from them and continue moving forward since it’s impossible to go back in time to change them.

Fears should never prevent you from living your dream life. Obstacles are necessary for your journey. Personal growth needs mistakes. When you avoid anything because of the fear of failure, it is detrimental because you are also avoiding success.

Alter your perspective. Build on what you have. Use your knowledge. Start making small changes which will lead to bigger changes to allow you to live your best life.

Too many people choose to live a life of mediocrity and sadly won’t live out their dreams. Don’t be one of them. Let the past go and start living your best life immediately. Persistence is so important. Persistence and determination will get you where you want to be.

Remember all dreams start with taking action and one step. Do what you can the best you can.

The time has come to put your dream life into focus and make it a reality.

How to Become a Better Singer

30 Sunday Jun 2024

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One of the greatest ways to get a crowd going is with great music. Sure, DJ’s are great but there is nothing like hearing a live band. I am the lead singer in my band, Daze of Dari, and it is so rewarding when I see people smiling, dancing and having a great time.

A good singer possesses the ability to affect others by transporting them to another place and even by reaching their soul. Here are some tips to being a better singer:

Always be authentic. Be vulnerable and bear your soul through your voice. When you express yourself genuinely, you connect with the crowd.

Make the song your own. Just because you didn’t write the song and you aren’t the artist everyone is used to hearing, it doesn’t mean you can’t put your own spin on it and give it your own personal vibe. Never lose your own identity of who you are as a singer. Don’t be afraid to push any musical boundary and add your own flair to each song. Always tell a story. Be expressive every single time you sing with every word you sing.

By incorporating your own dynamics such as changing the volume, the intensity or the style, you connect with the audience because you will be conveying your own emotion to the song. Even different phrasing and interpretive choices will add to expression. It will create a captivating and more memorable performance. Authenticity goes a very long way.

Monitor your voice. Most singers perform in different locations, circumstances and situations. Many have careers and a life outside of singing. Singers should always be aware of how they use their voice each day. A singer’s voice is their instrument and needs to be protected so it’s strong enough to handle singing for hours at a gig.

Take vocal lessons. Think of a singer as an athlete. Athletes train and so should singers. Vocal coaches offer exercises to prepare vocals in order to target sound and texture. You will learn your range, develop control, flexibility and technique. Different styles need different coaching. For example, if you want to sing rock/pop music, you can learn to sing with a brassy, edgy quality.

Always warm up. I know that it sometimes seems like there is no time because we are constantly running from one thing to the next. By taking the time to do warm-up exercises, you will help your voice transition from your speaking to your singing range. We don’t speak and sing in the same range so it’s important to take time to warm up so that you are more easily able to reach various pitches and notes without straining or harming your voice.

Develop breath control. Breath control is fundamental for singing. It allows you to sustain long notes, control dynamics and give a powerful performance. It gives you more control over your voice and improves your overall technique.

Proper posture is crucial for optimal performance. Stand up straight, relax your shoulders and be sure that your neck and head are aligned with your spine. Having proper posture will allow your breath to flow, improve lung capacity and will enhance your vocal resonance. Try not to slouch or tense your muscles as doing so will restrict your vocal range and have a negative affect on your vocal quality.

Vocal resonance is the richness and depth of your voice. When you develop resonance, your voice will be fuller with more vibrancy. When you project your voice forward rather than trying to push or strain to be louder, you will enhance your vocals.

Just like warming up, you should cool down. Vocal cool-down exercises can help with recovery after singing for hours. There are various slides/glide exercises that can be found online. One of my vocal coaches taught me the Titze straw exercise. On your ride home, keep the music off and stay quiet. Your voice needs to recover.

Always pace yourself. Try to organize your setlist so that all songs that are highly vocally demanding aren’t one right after the other.

Change the key to fit your voice. If a song is too high, a semitone can make a big difference. When you have a sing-a-long song with a higher chorus, it’s very common practice for lead singers to turn the microphone toward the crowd to have them sing during the chorus. This will give you a break while you are engaging the audience.

Get your sound right. This is crucial. Vocals are not amplified and cannot compete with electronic instruments. If you overwork to be heard over the drums and electronic instruments, you can lose your voice. Be aware of both your microphone and monitor position and be sure your sound equipment is correctly adjusted. If all of these parameters are in order, you will not have to work so hard to project your voice in order to be heard. Always take time before the gig to work on sound and so a thorough sound check.

A couple of other tips are to record yourself so that you can hear your progress and practice every day

Becoming a lead singer is a journey. You will need to be patient, consistent and have an innate willingness to learn and practice. With these things, nothing can stand in your way.

    How to Stick to a Plan and Reach Your Goal

    27 Thursday Jun 2024

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    Each one of us has, at one time or another, felt super motivated about making a complete change in some aspect of our life. Sometimes we swear to start on Monday evening only to lose every ounce of interest by Wednesday afternoon.

    The path that we must take to reach our goals may not always be easy or smooth, but as long as we continue down the path in the right direction, a goal is attainable. If you are struggling to reach a goal, here are some tips on how to actually increase your stamina and help you to do what it takes.

    Firstly, remember to always make your goal attainable. Having an attainable goal is an important factor in how likely you will be to stick to a plan.

    Visualize your goal. At that first moment when you decided to pursue your goal, you visualized it to the point that it almost felt real. An important factor in sticking to and reaching a goal is just that. Incorporate visualization as a daily practice. When you wake up in the morning visualize the process, even the struggle, and see the end result of how it would look once you attain your goal. When you picture yourself doing what it takes and reaching the ever-so-wonderful finish line, it will greatly help your dream become a reality. Visualize daily.

    Write in a journal. Writing down your goal greatly increases your chances of sticking to a plan. Answer questions such as “When do I want to achieve this?” “How will I feel when I achieve it?” “How does my goal connect to who I am and my values?” Describe your goal very specifically. By writing in a journal, you can also measure your progress and record it. Write daily.

    Always have an If-Then plan. This will allow you to plan for the unexpected and still stick to your plan. It will allow you to create a strategy and stick to what you need to do. You will have fewer excuses to quit and more options to continue.

    Tell others about your goal and get them involved. Social support is a wonderful way to stick to your goal. When people in your life become aware of what you are looking to accomplish, why and when you want to accomplish it and how you will go about making it happen, it holds you accountable. When others give you feedback, keep you accountable and become your cheerleader, it’s likely that you will continue down the path to reach your goal. Tell others.

    Plan the first step. There is an old Chinese proverb that says “A journey of 1000 miles begins with a single step.” Take that first step. Take that step even if it is something as simple as doing research and reading about what you need to do in order to reach your goal. From the first step, move to the second, the third and so on. Take that first step.

    Always believe in yourself. You need to believe in yourself in order to stick to the plan. By believing in yourself, you increase your chances of reaching your goal. Believe in what you can achieve. Remember the saying “If you can believe it, the mind can achieve it.”

    Working towards goals can be difficult. It can be frustrating. Regardless, moving forward is crucial. Sometimes what you thought would work doesn’t. It is then that you think of and incorporate something else that will continue you to move forward. If you find that you are struggling, that’s where social support helps. Ask those that know about your goal for some ideas. It may shed a different light and make you see things in a different way. Adjusting a goal is always an option, giving up is not.

    Celebrate your victory. When you reach your goal, relish in it. Be proud of yourself and thank anyone who supported you along the way.

    Be clear about what you want. Have a plan. Have support. Create goals that work for you to create the life that you want. Use these techniques and your dreams can soon be your reality.

    My Passion for Singing

    21 Friday Jun 2024

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    Everyone has that outlet in their life, something they do to replenish the energy of their soul. For some it can be gardening, biking, painting, etc…. for me, it’s singing.

    At every single point in my chaotic and sometimes crazy path, music has always found its way into my world. I have listened to music from a very young age. I had a vast collection of 45’s and a decent collection of LP’s. I also always walked around with a radio. Two of my favorite artists to listen to when I was younger were Olivia Newton John and The Partridge Family but I loved pretty much everything on the radio back then. 70’s music was fabulous! Music was always there for me and has always been a factor in my life.

    A passion for singing usually takes root in early childhood. For me that spark was ignited on the evening of November 4, 2022 at 9:43 p.m.

    Weeks prior to that evening, my husband and I were in our kitchen having wine and playing cards, with the music blasting. I was singing along quietly to the music and my husband looked me in the eyes and said “One of these days, I’m going to get you a microphone.” I replied with something like “Yeah right! You’ll never hear me sing!”

    Fast forward a couple of weeks ahead. It was a Friday night and my husband, my friend and I were having some wine at my home, again with the music blasting. A few drinks later, my husband brings out a karaoke machine and he was the first one to use it. He sang “Runaways” by The Killers. Now my husband is a drummer, not a singer and it wasn’t his best but he had a blast. We all did. I thought to myself “Wow, if he can do that sounding like he does, I can too!” Remember, I was a few drinks in. I got up and sang “Top of the World” by The Carpenters.

    The rest of the evening we sang, laughed and had a great time and when I woke up the next morning, I watched the videos and the reel I posted on Facebook. I received so many nice comments on the reel that I immediately knew that I wanted to do it again the following weekend. So we did. Weekend after weekend we’d have wine, blast music and sing karaoke. I was absolutely loving it and decided to take this newfound passion to the next level.

    On December 27, 2022, I had my first singing lesson. I was very nervous going and my son Joshua came with me for moral support. It was time. It was 4:00 and my vocal coach, Mike, came out to get me. It was all or nothing at this point. I could flee or I could face my fear and conquer it.

    I followed him into this little room with a piano. I remember quite vividly asking him if the walls were soundproof and he told me they weren’t. My thoughts were racing. “How am I going to do this?” “I should just forget it.” “Should I run out of this room?” After talking for a few minutes and making me feel a little more relaxed, Mike played a single note on the piano and said “Ok, sing that.” Excuse me? What? Sing that? I looked at him like he had a unicorn horn sticking out of his forehead. You mean there’s no loud music to sing to? (And there is no wine involved?) How on earth will I do this?

    With every ounce of passion deep within me and with every drop of courage I could find, I took a deep breath, closed my eyes and sang that single, ever-so-important note. I did it! Next we worked on scales to find my range, which I must say was quite impressive. I thought to myself “This isn’t bad at all” and I left there feeling so damn proud of myself and I couldn’t wait for the following week’s lesson to do it again!

    Well I’m an all-or-nothing kind of person. I bought all kinds of music equipment: speakers, a microphone, a mixer. I purchased an app to practice vocals with, where you remove the vocals from tracks. I recorded myself daily and practiced every single day. I purchased and surrounded myself with music decor. I even had things custom made. I made a beautiful music room for myself.

    In May of 2023, I decided I wanted to start a cover band to play live music out in bars, clubs, festivals… wherever I could. After auditioning many musicians and dealing with so many disappointments, the vision and dream has become an amazing reality.

    I am now a lead singer and my band’s name is Daze of Dari. I have the absolute greatest bandmates. We have become family and great friends. We rehearse at a rehearsal studio every week. Our setlist is full, unique and fun and we have played out a few times and have more gigs scheduled. We play mostly in Morris County, New Jersey but we don’t limit ourselves to any single area.

    If you want to take anything away from this, it is this. Never, ever, ever give up on your dreams. I am living proof that perseverance and passion will take you wherever it is that you want to go!